[Stillstanding]

I was reading Daq's post about lack of support and it made think about the ideas we have for planning for our birth and postpartum period. I would love to know what ideas are out there for 'pre' planning.

We will be going from 4 children to 7 almost instantly, and I've started thinking about how I can prepare because we don't have a lot of support here.

Meal freezing is on the top of my list.
I'm trying to think of ways to cut down on chores without the house falling apart while I lay in bed and recover. I always do too much too soon because of lack of help. But this usually requires creativity, which I lack badly in pregnancy. Any ideas for laundry, dishes, etc?

I'm thinking of trying to get things together for the children 'now'. Make each of them a tupperware of things to do with their names on it, but again... needing more creativity here.

I want my herbs and health things in order and organized before babe arrives. Our children from Liberia may have some health issues to deal with as well, at the same time, and I'm trying to prepare as best I can for that.
(Any good natural ideas for head fungus by the way?)

Ok, so I would love to hear from you on what you would do and how you would prepare if you knew you wouldn't have much help and hubby can't take off work?

Thanks and blessings,

[Emmy]

Amy, I have some help from another free group called FLylady. I think others on this site may know about it. Its a helpful tool to help organize daily life and chores. But Flylady shares a lot about taking care of yourself so you can take care of others. She talks about the mental attitude alot. For me that has helped tremendously. I have been greatly blessed by that website/group.

As far as specific postpardum help... do you have church members that can help? I know personally I have a hard time asking for help. There can be people in a church that want to serve and bless someone but they have no idea of who needs help.

If that doesn't help.... yes, freezing meals is wonderful! Depending on how old your kids are... you can have lists of things for them to help with.

If you make a schedule which can be very helpful I recommend not stressing too much if it all doesn't happen according to plan. Don't beat yourself up if things don't go perfectly.

Its amazing what can be done in 15 minutes! This can be fun for kids... set a timer for 15 minutes or 5 or whatever... have game of who can get there chore done in that time frame.

With the flylady - its international... but you can get to know other "flybabies" in your local area. I've been a part of a local group for over 2 years. We've had lots of good ideas and things to share and some of us have gone to others homes to help out on big chores. We've blessed each other with things we didn't need and another did.

Flylady is secular. She herself claims to be christian and much of her staff as well. the local groups can vary from group to group and you can find all kinds of beliefs. For myself I've found some good Christian friends that I trust and love dearly.

In today's society its hard to have that "family" community when families are so busy. Plus many of us are miles and states away from another family member. Its nice to have a church family but even those can be really busy at times too.

I am a Side tracked Home Executive (SHE) and I know that my house can be in CHAOS (can't have anyone over sydrome) but I also know that I can do anything in 15 minutes and even housework done incorrectly still blesses my family.

sorry if this was long. My two biggest passions are homebirthing and Flylady... :)
I am not trying to sell you on this either. Just sharing what has been one of the biggest blessings for me.

I hope that this helps a little and maybe sparks some more ideas for you.

Blessings,
Emily

[birthblessed]

My kids got parcelled out for the first month postpartum. Belen, Reuben and Bethany spent a week before she was born with my MIL. She brought them back, then took R home with her again the day before E was born, then brought him back Sat. after E was born. John went home with my parents on Sat after E was born, for almost 4 weeks. MIL stayed at my house from the day my parents left, for a week. When she left she took Ed. Then she brought him back the next week and took Bethany and Belen.

It sounds crazy... never knew who was coming or going LOL... but essentially it meant that we only had 4-5 kids at any time. And when I had 5 of them, MIL was there to help. That 2nd week I didn't have MIL and only 4 kids other than the baby... and I had a postpartum doula come two days. The third day some of the kids were parcelled out to a few church families. The 4th week I had only Jacob, Ed, Reuben and Eden. THAT week was SO quiet... the house stayed clean, we kept up with laundry easily, the bathroom stayed clean, the kids were good all week.

Now she was a month old on Sunday. I had ALL my kids back home and was alone with them last Friday. Friday we ordered pizza with a gift card we'd received as a gift. Monday we had a meal delivered-- it was enough food to feed us Tuesday as well. Tonight we had a meal delivered. We have 4 freezer meals still, I'll use one Friday and probably the other next Monday-Wednesday. Jeff is off on Thursdays and Saturdays. On Sunday we can use a Scholtzky's gift card we have.

So it will turn out that I had house help, childcare help, meal help for almost 6 weeks after her birth.

And I needed every bit of it. I think i'm going to have a housecleaner come this week or next (a lady at church who needs the money) to help me with the deep cleaning needed after mom doing bare minimum for the last 4-6 weeks. I mean, my MIL and my doula did clean, but it was scrub-tub-and-toilet and keep the kitchen from being a disaster zone. I need some help getting stuff no one else bothered to reach (does it only bother ME that there is dust on the tops of windows and cobwebs up high on the celings? why am I the only one who cleans these things?)

[mamaperk]

Well i only went from four to five in December but it was a week before Christmas so I wanted to be prepared.

I gave up on my ideals about disposable plates and cups for a while ... so I stocked up on paper plates and plastic ware and used that stuff as much as possible. I also stocked up on cereal and instant oatmeal ... wouldn't normally want the kids filling up on cereal but desperate times and all that. LOL! They fixed their own breakfast as well as Dylan's for a couple weeks ... that was awesome. A few of those days DH made real breastfast and that was a feast.

I had frozen some meals ahead of time ... did get some 'take out' and relied on sandwiches for dinner a few times. We all survived and everyone thought of it as a treat.

One thing I really craved was some alone-time with my newborn ... so it was a HUGE blessing on Day 4 when my friend came over before lunch and picked up all three of my middle children and kept them out till

I don't have much child-care help from Dh ... he's not really patient w/ the kids and that stresses me out more than helps ... so I appreciate him cleaning and cooking more than keeping an eye on the kids. I prefer to have a trusted friend or family member pick up the kids and take them out for some fun since I'm not able to do it.

If you have anyone you trust or ANYONE who offers to help ... TAKE THEM UP ON IT!!!!! :P

Some things that have helped me in the past, and some things that I've seen help my friends ... freezer meals (a MUST) ...

help with laundry - if you have no help in that area ... let the kids wear their pajamas for an extra night or two and reuse their clothes a few times to play in unless they're really dirty.

healthy snacks: I cut up cheese into squares and had whole wheat crackers stocked so I could grab some cheese and crackers in a pinch if I was nursing and starving and unable to fix myself a snack. I did the same w/ veggies and had them all ready w/ some 'dip' (ranch dressing) so I could snack easily while nursing the newborn. This also helped the kids to grab healthy snacks instead of wanting to eat extra bowls of cereal. LOL! I made up a bunch of granola in advance, so I could eat that dry or the kids could eat it as cereal for breakfast.

Oooh baby crying, gotta run...