Christian UC: Unassisted Birth

The Unassisted Birth of Jonathan

I had been having painless braxton hicks for a few weeks, so I didn't pay much attention to the ones I was having Monday night, beginning around 8 or so. I watched some television and baked some cookies and ate them after I had put the girls to bed, while Brian worked on business in the bedroom . Near 10 or so I went to the bathroom and noticed some bloody show. I was suprised. I wondered if tonight I would have the baby or if it would still be a few more days...weeks, etc. I had a feeling though..so I went and woke Brian, (who wasn't too thrilled to have been woken up). The "braxton hicks" were more regular..but I wasn't sure if I was in labor because it was just a minor tightning..no pain. Brian seemed really tired so I asked if maybe I should phone some of my friends from church so that if I was in labor they could help keep me company. I hadn't planned on having anyone else besides me and Brian there but I felt the need for support and to me following your heart/instinct is what UC is about. Brian replied.."don't you think it is a little late?" It was 11 pm. I told him that I didn't think that they would mind.

So...still not knowing if I was in labor I called my friend Mika and asked if she and Jill would like to come..but that I wasn't sure this was labor, and that if they didn't want to make the trip not knowing for sure that was okay. She said she would come and asked if Liz could come if Jill was unable to make it; I said okay. I hung up the phone and turned on the television. Almost immediately it was like a button was pushed and within minutes I began feeling crampy..like menstral cramps. I walked around and I had Brian rub my back while I breathed through them. They were very short and a few minutes apart...though I cannot say for sure since we were not timing the labor. I went to the bathroom again and noticed more bloody show. The cramps were definately becoming contractions..though I was suprised to feel them only low in my abdomen and lower back. (I had expected my whole abdomen, back, down my legs, etc.). I ran a hot bath and sprayed hot water on my abdomen during the contractions and Brian rubbed my lower back. They were definately intense. I got out of the bathtub to go to the bathroom. I put some cool cloths on my abdomen and was moaning through some contractions and I saw Liz. (Mika was still in the living room). At that point it was only about an hour since I had spoken with Mika on the phone, (when I wasn't sure that I was in labor), . so it was.a little after midnight and I couldn't really talk to them other than to say a quick hello because I was so focused on the labor..almost as if I was consumed with it. I had Brian hold me through the contractions on the toilet and asked Liz/Mika to please wet some cloths with cool water. They did that while Brian rubbed my back and held me through contractions. I was very vocal..it was pretty intense feeling and I wasn't sure how much further I had to go. I was feeling hot and shaky and the contractions seemed close together though not very long. I went and lay on my side in the bed..the pain was so intense and I felt like I just needed to lie down to try to collect myself. Brian didn't think that I should get into the bed because he had remembered me telling him that women don't need to be put in bed to labor, but I told him I needed it just for a bit to collect myself. I asked Mika/Liz to go get ice from the freezer to help with the cool cloths and they did that.
They stood by the door and handed the cloths to Brian and I put them where I needed them. Brian was rubbing my back and I asked Mika if she would just hold my hand through some contractions. So..she did. Other than me moaning/vocalizing/etc. it was pretty quiet in the room and then I asked what time it was. It was near 1 a.m. I said okay and that I needed to go to the bathroom, (pee). Mika said.."yeah you probably should empty your bladder". So..I got on the toilet and moaned through some contractions..and went pee/poo, etc. I was soooo unhappy and felt hot, shaky, and like crying. I didn't feel any pressure like I would have to push anytime soon and my water hadn't broke yet. I was sure that I had hours to go..and I felt like such a failure at labor because I knew that I was vocalizing pretty loudly. I reached down and felt for the bag of waters. It was bulging and intact. I asked out loud to anyone who would care to hear me if I should break it. (Though I think that I was trying to figure out whether or not I should...I was rather unsure about it). I felt the bag get tighter during a contraction and before I knew what was happening..I had broke the bag. Gush! All of a sudden I felt a head on my hand. That got my attention. I am sure that I looked like a deer caught in a pair of headlights. I was trying to keep the head from coming out too fast; I felt like Iwas going to tear up through my urethra. I yelled, "counter pressure!!" Brian thought that I meant on my back..but I wanted him to help me hold the head from blasting out. So...Brian is behind me.
I am sitting on the toilet with my hand holding a head back as best as I can..while I am also pooing. (I am so thankful that I was on the toilet).

Anyways, I started trying to tell him no, that wasn't where I wanted him but I couldn't say anything because my leg was shaking and I was focused on the head. I heard someone say, "honey, he is going to fall in the toilet.." or something like that. Then it was really blurry. I remember seeing Liz putting on gloves and Brian holding/pulling me up to a standing slant sort of squat over the toilet and then I felt the baby just come out of me and I heard a gush and a loud cry/crys. And before I could see straight someoene had handed me the baby. I had my hands on him..but I loosed my grip on him as he blasted out and I saw that Liz was there. He blasted into Liz...along with a lot of amniotic fluid.

I was helped into bed carrying the baby. I just stared at him. He had tons on black hair and looked healthy. (We found out the next day that he was 9 lbs. 3oz. and 21 and 1/8 in. long., 15 in. head). Mika and Liz cleaned up so that Brian and I could focus on the baby and each other, and we talked a bit and then they left. It is still such a blur in my mind. I am so thankful to have had this baby at home. I wasn't hooked up to any machines or talked into any postions, confined to bed, etc.
Everything was pretty much on my terms and everyone was respectful of what I asked and wanted. As I continue to process my feelings about this birth I don't think that I was prepared for several things. I had a lot of fear (of labor pain)..and I think that made the actual discomfort worse than it was. I was trying to intellectualize where I thought I should be (progress wise in labor) and I became a bit discouraged when I thought that I wasn't that far along..when I was actually almost done. I also did a lot of vocalizing and I felt really weak about that at first. I had these visions of a nice, quiet, peaceful homebirth..and it was actually a really wild, intense ride. I also found that I am glad that I had some friends there..and I was really unsure about who if anyone I wanted at the birth the whole pregnancy; I had a lot of conflicting feelings about that..but when the time came I called a few friends and they came and were really great at the birth. They didn't interfere at all and just did what we asked. (but otherwise just sat quietly). Our first homebirth really has made me want to have any other babies at home the same way. I also think that it bonded me and my husband closer. Even though we had 2 other people there..they let me and him be together and he helped me through the tough contractions. He told me after the birth that he felt closer to me than he had in a long time...and that meant a lot. So..anyways, that is what I remember about the birth thus far. I am still pretty tired from doing night duty with a newborn..so if anyone has any questions or comments feel free to email me to discuss them.

Thanks for reading,

Jenni

~ top of page ~