|
 |
|
|
|
|
Yvonda's Journal
Expecting October 2003
Sun Jun 22, 2003
Introduction
My name is Yvonda Groff. I am 24 years old. I have had three babies born unassisted (and one unassisted miscarriage), with my husband and the Lord and me, and usually a friend or two present. I’ve never had any other kind of birth. I really have learned a lot through the births we’ve experienced. I’ve grown a lot closer to the Lord. For me, childbirth is an opportunity to worship the Lord in a very unique way. At no other time am I so totally out of control; I have to totally submit to Him in trust.
I have many stories of miracles throughout our experiences with birth and related issues. My husband and I have a sweet understanding with the Lord in which we aren’t adamantly opposed to medical intervention, but we will always seek Him first and proceed according to what we feel He is leading us to do. When I was 5 months pregnant with my first, I began bleeding heavily. After praying about what we should do, we felt we should just ignore it. So we did. The bleeding gradually stopped and we never had any more problems; the baby was born and was very healthy and always has been. We’ve had large perineal tears, retained placenta, troubles breastfeeding, but trusting in the Lord and seeking Him has always proven to be the very best path. He not only keeps us safe when surrounded by enemies on every side, but He accomplishes things in our hearts and lives as we wait and trust in Him. He is worthy of our trust.
I know that there are some unassisted childbirths that do not go well, even when people say they are trusting the Lord (there are some that way in Dr. assisted as well). Childbirth is very personal, and there isn’t much to be found in the Bible specifically stating how we should give birth. Each person is accountable to the Lord in what they do; He sees our hearts. It’s not an issue of whether or not we have medical intervention; it’s an issue of obedience to the Lord. Sometimes He asks us to walk in paths that seem contrary to what we perceive by our natural eyes as His nature. He is calling us to love Him so much we follow the Lamb wherever He goes. I encourage other mothers to genuinely seek the Lord regarding childbirth and to do what He puts in their hearts to do.
There is one more issue I must address before beginning my journal; it is an issue I come across quite often. It is a very imperative issue, that is, concerning a woman’s relationship to her husband. So often we women have impressions from the Lord concerning things before our husbands realize what the Lord is saying. This is especially true in regards to personal things like childbirth. There is a trap in this, though, because many times we as women have impressions that are wrong, too. That’s why the Lord wants us to submit to our husbands. I have many personal experiences of times I felt the Lord wanted us to do something but my husband didn’t feel the same. I shared my opinion gently, then took it to the Lord in prayer. (Many times I don’t even share with my husband, just with the Lord!) I have seen the Lord change my husband’s heart totally, and I have also seen the Lord change MY heart and not do what I thought. I have come to greatly appreciate my husband as another tool in the Lord’s hands to protect and guide me. I do not expect the Lord to protect me when I have been resisting my husband. This is important in the issue of childbirth. Our husbands are accountable to the Lord with whether they follow Him in areas or not. We, on the other hand, are accountable to the Lord for sharing gently, and then obeying our husbands. He will protect us and accomplish His purposes in our whole families if we trust Him by submitting to our husbands.
Different times people come to me asking my advice on matters like childbirth. There are those who want to know sincerely, who are seeking to know what the Lord wants for them, who are walking purely by keeping in right relationship to the Lord and their husbands. There are also those who want to hear what I have to say for the benefit of their curiosity, their carnal mind trying to figure out what they will do by the force of their will. I hope and pray for each of you that the Lord will bless you as you seek Him in the area of childbirth and all areas of life. May your heart be sincere and your walk pure before Him, that He may bless you tremendously at the culmination of all things.
Blessings,
Yvonda (aka MamaGroff)
Entry One
This is my fifth pregnancy. We were in the preparations for moving to Israel when I started suspecting a pregnancy in late January/ early February. I had some queasies with previous pregnancies, but nothing like this one. A lot of the time I could hardly do anything but lay still on the sofa and think, “I’m NOT going to throw up…!” I was overwhelmed trying to envision myself and my husband toting three small children overseas to a new place where we were unsure just what would happen. Thankfully the Lord is merciful, and our preparations didn’t wrap up until my morning sickness did. By the time we were getting on the airplane, I was feeling pretty good.
With each of my pregnancies, before I got pregnant my husband and I would ask the Lord for certain things in a baby, such as boy or girl, hair color, eye color, personality traits, etc. It was fun to see how the Lord would answer. He didn’t answer every detail, but most everything we asked, and definitely with the gender of each of our children, He gave us what we asked for. The last time we prayed was a few months before I was pregnant with our fourth baby. I had a miscarriage at 8 weeks. We didn’t pray again. I think we thought that the Lord hadn’t really answered that prayer with that baby. We prayed for twins!!
I have to include that detail, because with this pregnancy, suddenly at 19 weeks I started GROWING and got pretty big very quickly. I was 25cm at 19 weeks, and grew to be 34cm at 22 weeks!! I got very interested in the whole thing, because I know what we prayed, and I know how the Lord has answered us in the past…. I became curious about twin UC’s. I actually found about four stories of twin UC’s on Laura Shanely’s site. I came to realize and believe that it is no more of a thing for the Lord to deliver two than one—if He made two, He can deliver them safely, and does, if we keep our nose out of it.
I looked up on the internet if there is any way of telling whether you’re pregnant with twins without an ultrasound. There are certain characteristics to a multiple pregnancy, but ultimately there’s no sure way except an ultrasound or the actual birth!
Having just moved to Israel, we began investigating how to obtain a birth certificate and passport following a UC here. For a long time, it seemed that not only would I have to have someone certified witness the actual birth, but I’d also have to have proof of prenatal care, something I never had before in my life. The thought of possible twins added to my discouragement, as I wondered what all these “interveners” would try to do with me if they knew I had twins. I spent one, long sleepless night wrestling with the idea. Finally the Lord showed me the way—He knows my heart, He knows we trust Him, He knows what we want, and He wants me to keep trusting Him, no matter where things lead. This is beyond my control, but not His. Even if I ended up with a C-section, I could trust Him through it all, just as I always have. This gave me incredible peace. Soon after that night, I found a midwife who is sympathetic to UC-ers and very helpful. She gave us lots of options. We found (so far) that the way of least intervention is to get one simple ultrasound. Then we will have the proof we need to get proper papers for the baby.
We are still in the process of trying to get our citizenship here, and aren’t sure if we will be able to stay for the birth of the baby(s), so we are waiting until we have permanent plans before going ahead with an ultrasound. That way we won’t do one unnecessarily.
This week has been pretty good for me, besides the feeling of stretching skin (ow!), I’ve been doing pretty well. I have to take things easy, and don’t find it too difficult to do so. Every now and then I have a day (like today!) when I have to lay down and rest in bed. I can’t describe the feeling, except I just KNOW I have to rest in bed. I wonder if this is God’s prescribed “bed-rest”! I turned my hip funny today and this adds to the need to rest, as when I walk it is a bit painful.
It’s so cool how when there is no one else telling me what I should do, I can hear much more clearly what the Lord is saying to me in my spirit and through my body. This is so important!
We continue to pray for grace on days like this, that they will pass. I think I feel tired like this mainly because we had a big day yesterday walking all around Jerusalem trying to get papers for living here!
That’s where we are for now. This is a long journal entry because I’m already 5 months and needed to catch up! Next week will probably be pretty short. :)
Sun Jun 29, 2003
Entry Two... Twenty-four weeks
This week has been actually somewhat eventful in regards to my pregnancy. I was having some real braxton hicks this week. It was keeping me in bed a whole lot, and one day I was in bed almost all day. Finally, my husband came in the room and laid beside me to talk. We talked about trusting the Lord over the baby(s). He said that I shouldn’t have to lay down all day; the Lord knows all that I need to get done. I cried because I knew it was a real possibility to go into preterm labor and lose the baby(s). But inside I KNEW my husband was right. So, I gave it to the Lord and got up.
Ever since then I have been fine, with almost no contractions at all, even when I have a busier day. What a great and wonderful Lord we serve!
I met another woman here due about the same day as I am. I realized how much bigger I am than normal when I saw her. She is tall and built like I am, so it was a fair comparison. I told her that if her baby was positioned flat, mine was positioned with its head at my spine and its feet at my belly button!!!
I measured 34cm last time I checked. I feel lots of movement, but still don’t have the motivation (permanent citizenship here) or the money ($275) for an ultrasound. The Lord will have that at the right time if it is to be. I’m preparing for more than one, however, just in case….
Either my hips are sore and I have sciatic nerve pain, or I can barely breathe or eat. But usually I get a break one way or the other, at least so far!!
My sister is coming in August to stay with us, and I am so excited; I can hardly wait. She has been at two of my births, and about 20 other births, all kinds of births. She is biased toward UCs, of course! She is an excellent “lay doula” and knows just what to do, like a pro. (She’s only 20 years old.) People tell her she should get into that field. She says, “Nah, I just want to have my own babies!” (She’s not married yet.)
That’s about it for this week. I just keep waddling along…
Tue Jul 01, 2003
24 week belly picture... Check this out!
Here's the link to my belly picture at 24 weeks, 35cm!
hee hee! :biglaugha:
Sun Jul 06, 2003
Twenty-five Weeks
Well, things were calmer this week, not many braxton hicks going on. But one night, (my children were sick with stomach flu), while my husband so graciously took charge of the children, I laid in bed with several, painful and strong contractions.
Now, being 25 weeks and 36cm, what am I to think? I may just have a baby sooner than I thought...
But anyhow, I finally said to the Lord, "Look. You're the One who knows what's gonig on. You take care of it."
My husband prayed for the contractions to stop and then answered another baby call.
Then I began to realize that the baby was not coming that night. This thought kept running through my head. I really began believing it. And they slowed up.
I went back to sleep. I honestly think it is all the stress from moving to a new country and having almost nothing. So, I've been learning to rest more in the Lord.
Other than that, noneventful week in regards to the pregnancy. I think the baby(s) moved position-- the movement feels more up and down instead of side to side. And stronger, too.
I'm still going strong, 11cm over weeks. No ultrasound yet; not in a hurry to get one, either.
I'm excited about the baby(s) coming, but not wanting to start labor anytime soon!
My sister will be here in August, and she will be a big help. Met a lady who does great lactation consultant work for free here. She wants to get together before the birth. We'll see. I'm feeling her out on her slant towards the medical establishment. I hate to work with controlling medical personel, if you know what I mean. So we'll see where that leads.
Honestly, the more I think about it, the more I feel like the Lord is saying, "Why don't you just totally trust Me with breatfeeding?" (something I really haven't done yet...)
signing off,
Yvonda aka MamaGroff
Mon Jul 14, 2003
Twenty-six weeks... but who really knows???
This was a hectic week. Today we went in to apply (yet again) for citizenship. We finally got the applications submitted, and are to call in a month for an answer on whether we can stay or not.
As far as the pregnancy, I go from day to day, one day thinking "It MUST be twins!" and the next thinking, "Nah, there's no way." I still measure 11cm over weeks. My belly seems lopsided, like I'm used to seeing with one, so maybe there is only one, due to arrive sooner than I thought.
I am feeling overall pretty good, and I'm glad to feel the baby move; it reminds me that I'm not a hippo for lack of self-control in eating....
I am big and getting bigger. Just the way it is when you're pregnant! The children are getting antsy for the baby to be born, now that they can feel it kick. My three year old is always asking, when will the baby come out???
No ultrasound yet, and happy as a lark not to have one. I have four weeks more now to wait before I even know if I'll be here for the birth. Maybe I'll HAVE the baby before then, even! No big deal; I know the Lord has the perfect way and the perfect timing for everything concerning this birth.
Another thing, I've noticed I am carrying pretty low throughout the duration of this pregnancy. It's lower than usual for me. It's different. I'm also very wide from side to side, and when I feel my belly, it feels hard, like it's really FULL. That's all different for me this time around.
We are looking forward to another week! :)
Mon Jul 21, 2003
twenty-seven weeks, but now I'm really starting to wonder...
okay. to give you all an idea of how I feel, I don't want to write in here.
just go read Amanda's journal.
I am zoning out the last week, last two days especially. All I want to do is eat and sleep. I have contractions half the night, and wake up like I was hit by a truck.
I also have dreams every night about a baby. Well, one night it was one baby, the next night it was two babies. Never having been pregnant with twins, I wonder if maybe this is just one after all.
Anyhow, I'm glad my husband is home all day, and my sister is coming in a few weeks.
That's all I want to say. :P
Yvonda
Tue Jul 22, 2003
Belly picture 26 weeks / 6 months
Here's the link to my most recent belly picture.
Enjoy!!
Thu Jul 24, 2003
Just a mini-update...
greetings, all.
I wanted to post that the baby moved up, and now I am feeling a little more benevolent towards all mankind.
I still am preg brained, tired, and anti-social, but it's sooooooo nice to not feel like a baby is going to pop out and land at my feet, or that my hips are going to come apart.
Love,
Yvonda
Mon Jul 28, 2003
Twenty-eight weeks
Okay. Now I'm really starting to think I may have just one in there. I measure 38cm this week. Not growing really fast or anything anymore. I shot out pretty fast in the beginning, gaining 10cm in about two weeks, and five the two weeks after. But now it's a cm/week, if that much.
This week has been better by far than last. I honestly don't feel like there's a baby coming anytime soon around here. I feel like it will be another two or three months, even though I measure so big this time. I have been REALLY tired the last few days, but today is better. I was taking two 2-hour naps morning and afternoon. My appetite was almost nil. But last night it picked up again.
I'm really trying hard to stay away from sugar. It's that yeast-thing. I don't have a yeast infection, but I have similar feelings to when I had the candida in the colon-- spacy, wierd headaches...hard to describe. So I'm limiting my sugar, though I can't do more. We can't get good meat here, and it's expensive, and all I have to live on is mostly rice, bread, pasta, and potatoes, with a few sides thrown in...
Someone decided to bless me and is sending some alfalfa tablets to my mom to have her send next week with some friends who are coming here. And I've been drinking a lot more of my raspberry/peppermint/alfalfa tea lately, too. And suddenly I got this bright idea-- why shouldn't I be doing more Kegels???
The baby moves sooooooooooo much, that I feel like sometimes I want to put it down for a minute. It really makes me feel over-touched lots of times.
So...these weeks of waiting... :(
My sister, our other friends, and our finding out if we have citizenship are all in the same week-- in two more weeks. Didn't think days could go so slow.
My husband is working on building a little bassinet thing right up next to my side of the bed. That will be nice.
Oh, and I'm suddenly potty-training my almost 2 year-old daughter...
NEXT page
Copyright © 2002 Christian UC All rights reserved.
